My Family Blows worse that the Hurricane did

Sit down boys and girls, we’re gonna be here a while…

 

First off, we’re fine.  No major damages, just some water clean up, debris clean up and then there was all the fun to be had when we threw all the food in the refrigerator out because we didn’t have power for days.  Compared to most of the Galveston/Houston/Woodlands areas we got off very easy and for that we are extremely grateful.

 

Thank you everyone who called (most of you repeatedly) over the last week to check on us.  I am so grateful to have such wonderful, caring people in my life and your calls and emails really did mean so much to us.

 

As for my “family” (with the exception of my dad) who never once bothered to pick up a phone or send a text or email to make sure we were okay and still in one piece, and that we still had a house…well, um…I guess I only have four words for you and I can’t imagine that you’re all that surprised when I say that those words are FUCK YOU…WE’RE DONE.

 

There is not one of you who I have not been there for when you needed support or needed an ear to listen to you or a shoulder to cry on over the years.  There is not one of you who I have not done everything in my power for when I could.  Yes, there are some times that I was unable to assist you because I live half way across the fucking country or you were pissed off about a situation where I had no control or influence in the matter (i.e. Mom moving to Chicago) and you can’t even pick up a phone to make sure that I’m alive?  Yeah…you fucking suck.

 

I honestly don’t know which is worse: Not bothering to call at all or responding to a text telling you that I was freaking out and scared with “I hope Max has water wings”?  Actually, the more I think about it the more I’m inclined to think that the smart-ass comments are worse. 

 

Really?  How fucking heartless and twisted are you to make this kind of a fucking joke when there is a disaster that is causing people their lives and property going on?  And seriously…what the fuck did my DOG ever do to you?  Better yet…what the fuck did I ever do to you?  At this point I’m thinking that the Dingos that eat their young are probably more compassionate than you are.  At least the baby dingo’s are spared growing up and realizing what self absorbed assholes they have as relatives.  With the exception of a (very) few people, I think I would have been better off having the Manson Family as relatives that the asshats I got stuck with.

 

Now, before I go any further (and believe me, I could go on for days…I even have a lovely parallel drawn between my asshole family and life sucking vampires) let me get one thing straight.  There are going to be those of you who are going to actually have the balls to say (to each other, never to me directly because you are spineless) “Oh, look what a bitch she is.  She told the whole family to fuck off even her poor grandmother”.  Yeah…nice try, but my grandmother is not included in these statements. 

 

The reason my grandmother is not included in these statements is for the simple fact that I don’t even know where she is.  Last I heard she was in some assisted living facility somewhere and even that I had to hear second hand because you are all assholes (are you getting the point, that I think you’re all assholes?).  I have tried calling her house and don’t get any answer and I have tried texting you to find out where she is and how she is doing, but you’re so fucking juvenile that you won’t even give me that much information all because you’re pissed off at my mom.  Hell…I don’t even know if she’s alive because I wouldn’t put it past you dipshits to not bother giving me that information.

 

 

So at this point here’s where we stand:

 

Dad, Bub and the family I’ve created for myself here in Texas – good.

 

The rest of you – please do me the favor of going directly to hell.